Don't drop the anchor or drift - Sail!

To reach a port, we must sail—
Sail, not tie at anchor—Sail, not drift.

Franklin Roosevelt

One of the biggest challenges today is to keep moving toward our dreams, our objectives our goals. Realizing a destination takes work. All to often, we are throwing down an anchor and are stopped short. Other times, we allow ourselves to drop the sails and lose our momentum - drifting aimlessly. We're in motion but sometimes the current even takes us in circles.

A great deal of time and emphasis is placed on setting the course to the port of positive, health and success. Gather your resources, the best crew, clear maps, an accurate compass and any other supplies that will sustain you as you work each leg of your journey.

Don't drop the anchor or drift - Sail!

Overcoming Fear

What motivates? What leads some to leadership, contribution, courage, commitment, while others are resistive, passive, angry, destructive? These are age old questions. The good news to these questions are each individual has the answer. The bad news, each individual has to take the time to discover what had become buried over years of rejection, fear, intimidation and anger.

Acting with caution and staying quiet is becoming the norm. Taking the initiative to add value and make constructive changes draws attention and can set one up to be a target. Doing a job reasonably well and staying under the radar is safer than standing up and standing out.

Although people don't realize what has happened, fear has become one of the greatest motivators. One the greatest gifts a leader, mentor, coach, parent, partner can give to others is the gift of overcoming fear.

In 1987 Susan Jeffers, PhD first published Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. Her outstanding book provides five great truths:

Truth 1: The Fear Will Never Go Away As Long As I Continue to Grow.

Fear and anxiety will always be bubbling up to the surface. That's the nature of those butterflies that show up when you are given a promotion, enter into a new relationship or simply entering a new day.

Truth 2: The Only Way to Get Rid of The Fear of Doing Something is to Get Out and Do It.

Lack of action and actually actively resisting taking the next step is the worst thing any of us can do. Taking one small step at a time. Always moving towards your dreams and goals is better than letting them die.

Truth 3: The Only Way to Feel Better About Myself is to Go Out ... and Do It.

Tired of being tired and overwhelmed. Feeling anxious and worthless - set short term goals and notice your energy rise and your sense of accomplishment increase.

Truth 4: Not Only Am I going to Experience Fear Whenever I'm on Unfamiliar Territory, But So Is Everyone Else.

This is one time when appreciating that everyone, I mean everyone has fear. Even the most confident person we know has some degree of fear.

Truth 5: Pushing Through Fear is Less Frightening Than Living with the Underlying Fear that Comes with that Feeling of Helplessness

Want more good news, everyone, and I do mean everyone has courage. Find your courage.

Remember the cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz. He felt his fear and did it any!

Building AWE

AWE is defined in thefreedictionary.com as "a mixed emotion of reverence, respect, dread, and wonder inspired by authority, genius, great beauty, sublimity, or might."

What leads us to this emotion can be distilled down to three phases.

1. Awareness
2. Wisdom
3. Enjoyment

Some thing, some one, some experience triggers a response. It can be a work of art, music, a lovely autumn day, a conversation with a friend, a headline in the news. This "trigger" leads us to some level of awareness. This awareness can occur in a board room, a class room, over the internet, on a walk, driving in traffic. In reality, it is happening all of the time.

Once we are now aware of that stimulus, we use our wisdom, our beliefs to interpret what that information means. Our resources for making those interpretations comes from our personal and professional library. This library is the storage space where we have collected facts and fiction, illusions and inspirations, tips and tidbits. How we apply our wisdom actually takes us to the next level.

This final phase is enjoyment. How we move through those first two phases of awareness and wisdom will directly lead us to a wide and varied degree of enjoyment. We can experience amazing inspiration or overwhelming devastation, this certainly will determine our level of enjoyment.

Today, am making a conscious choice to do three things

1. Be aware of my actions, relationships, interests, environment
2. Expand my wisdom to how I am relating to myself and the outside world
   
3. And ultimately, experience enjoyment in the transitions and growth
   

What level of AWE would you like to experience?


What are three things you can do right now to help you get to that level of AWE?

1. 
   
2. 
   
3. 
   

Healthy Leadership; Get Rid of Self-Deception

Definition of Leadership - “ a process of influence in which one person can enlist the aid and support of others (I'd like to include SELF) in the accomplishment (of a goal) or task.”

Definition of Self-Deception - a process of denying or rationalizing away the relevance, significance, or importance of opposing evidence and logical argument. Self-deception involves convincing oneself of a truth (or lack of truth) so that one does not reveal any self-knowledge of the deception.

source: Wikipedia.com

For too long, the issue of self deception has been the realm of deep-thinking philosophers, academics and scholars working on the question of human sciences. the public remains generally unaware of the issue. that would be fine except that self- deception is so pervasive it touches every aspect of life. "Touches"is perhaps too gentle a word to describe its influence. Self-deception actually DETERMINES one's experience in every aspect of life.

Source: From the Preface of Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by the Arbinger Institute

Leadership and Self-Deception offers the theory that we all behave in "boxes." And further develops the concepts of How we get in the Box and What it takes to Get out of the Box.

The Arbinger Institute has taken a great leap forward over the last decade in promoting self awareness and self reflection to help every individual, no matter what their age, to look at all those actions and behaviors that limit our success in every aspect of life. Encouraging the philosophy that one powerful way out of those limitation is changing those limiting beliefs to become a powerful, influential, and health person for ourselves and others.

This book certainly has caused me to review how often I deceive myself in my degrees of success and health relationships, responsibilities and achievement of my life's purpose.

Health Intelligence

You're faced with a health challenge. It may be a chronic illness, or perhaps you are sedentary and over weight. The time to change your lifestyle is "now". Yet knowing how critical this is, you still procrastinate, making excuses and telling yourself "I'll start tomorrow". We all do this.

According to Joshua Freeman, the COO for Six Seconds EQ Network, a nonprofit organization putting emotional intelligence in action. says it begins with 1) "questioning the underlying assumption"-"know yourself". Raise your awareness of your patterns and feelings about taking care of yourself. If the idea of "having to do" something turns you away from it, redirect your feelings by understanding how this activity will help you and who can help you accomplish it.

2) "Accessing Useful Feelings"-"Choose Yourself". Celebrate your accomplishments. If every time you exercise, or choose a salad over pizza you begin to feel frustrated and want to give up, redirect your feelings to one of pride and accomplishment. Acknowledge yourself every time you make a healthy choice by noticing how proud you feel when choosing to be healthy.

3) "Focus on the larger purpose"- "Give Yourself". Give your health activity meaning by focusing on the bigger picture. How will taking care of yourself effect your life, your family, and your kids? Perhaps the idea of being around for you kids and future grand children will keep you motivated? How would you like your future to look?

In addition to these, I get inspiration and motivation from others who are reaching their goals. Giving and getting support is a necessary part of the process of achieving health.

Let's support each other. Write in and tell us what inspires you to take action when it comes to improving your health and how do you stay on track?

Judy Rienzi

Mind is the Master

"Mind is the Master-power that molds and makes, and Man is Mind, and evermore he takes the Tool of Thought, and shaping what he wills, brings forth a thousand joys, a thousand ills-He thinks in secret and it comes to pass; Environment is but his looking-glass."

James Allen
As A Man Thinketh

If we start our day with thoughts of disease and desperation, than that is what we will find. Conversely, if we start our day with interest and inspiration, that is what we will find.

Our thoughts will lead us to the highest service to humanity and health or to the greatest depths of dis-service and disease. Our thoughts are powerful things - more powerful than any obstacle or opportunity that shows up in our life.

Be a master of your thoughts. Start with one thought at time. Use your mind power, be positive and constructive, leading your to a richer, more productive life.

The Power of the Vision

"In great deed, sometimes abide.
On great fields, something stays.
Forms change and pass, bodies disappear
but spirits linger to consecrate ground for the vision place of the soul.
And reverent men and women from afar
and generations that know us not
and that we know not of,
shall come here to ponder and to dream
and the power of the vision
shall pass into their soul."
Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain

Life can be a pointless stroll or a purposeful adventure. When we have a powerful vision in front of us, we find motivation and energy. When we lack purpose and strategy, we often miss opportunities to enjoy life and fully actualize our skills, talents and existence.

The leader, whether a parent, a partner, an employer or employee, that instills vision surrounded by clear, healthy, positive values creates a environment of pondering and dreaming. And, once that vision is been embraced, great actions are taken and astonishing results are achieved.

A few questions to consider...

What vision(s) are you pondering and dreaming about?
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________

What vision are you putting out there today?
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________

What actions will you take today to achieve that vision?
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________

I'd love to hear your thoughts, ideas and visions.

The Road Not Taken

One of my favorite poems about choices.

The Road Not Taken
Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Health Value-Positive Thinking

Book Review

Dr. Joseph Murphy, author of the classic book The Power of the Subconscious Mind, has written a "Maximize Your Potential" series of books. The one I will be referring to is "Maximize Your Potential Through The Power of Your Subconscious Mind For Health and Vitality". In this book, his prescription for healthy aging lies within ourselves through positive thought.

You aren't old until you lose your curiosity and you heart becomes weary and unresponsive. As long as you're involved in life in many ways, you can't grow old in spirit. You only become feeble (no matter how many birthdays you've had), when you've lost touch with the youth, ideals, and spirit of your times...when you've ceased to grow and learn".

Do you know people who "think" themselves old? Just because you are of a certain age, does that mean you have to act and think of a certain age? Our negative thoughts sink into our subconscious mind, manifest problems in our body, and shorten life. If we have a poor mental attitude, then we impose our own self limitations.

As a minister, Dr. Murphy's book is both spiritual and inspirational. He focuses on aging, however the suggestions in this book are for any age. His principles for vibrant health lie in our thought process, ideas, beliefs, and mental attitude. Of course we all have to take responsibility for our body-eating well and exercising; but isn't that also part of our mental attitude?

Dr. Murphy's ideas are practical, trustworthy, and timeless. The central mind-body theme "is that new thoughts, ideas, attitudes and beliefs create new conditions".

Judy Rienzi

Health as a Value

The way to spend your time and energy wisely is to know the values by which you live. These values direct your decision making ability, your choices, and your behaviors. In times of crisis, especially a health crisis, our values come into focus. We become acutely aware of what's important in life and what our priorities are. This is why health is our number one core value, It is the value from which all else is determined.

Take a moment to list your top five values. These are the principles you use to make your decisions and are non negotiable.
____________ _______________
____________ _______________
_________________
If respect is one your values, then isn't respect for others and ourselves a health value?
If responsibility is one of your values, then isn't our responsibility to take care of ourselves a health value?

Health encompasses our whole being in all aspects of life; physical, mental, social, family, career, and finance. Your ability to examine all parts of your life and grow as a person is your total health.

Focusing on life through your health value will direct you toward spending time and energy where it counts the most and where it is needed the most. Ask yourself, "What is important to me"? "What gives my life meaning"? "What do I value"? After you answered these, ask yourself "What role does my health play in all of these answers"?

Health as a Value will give your life purpose, and direct you toward living the life you want.

Judy Rienzi

More than a Thought

We all encounter people with great ideas. We often engage in a great conversation and dreaming with ourselves and come up with astonishing ideas. And yet, so often many ideas "die on the vine" because nothing is done to get that terrific idea off the ground.

It takes more than the thought to achieve that dream. It takes planning and action.

Disciplining ourselves to create goals, plans and time commitments to move the ideal to the real is the secret to fulfillment and success. When we find ourselves stuck, reviewing options, discussing with a friend, mentor or other trusted advisers and having a heart to heart with ourselves will help to keep moving on that intangible dream.

Have you ever noticed how someone is getting credit of a great new concept or invention? No one can really steal your idea. If they do, it probably because they had the same dream or idea, they were dedicated, made a plan and took action to see it through. It was more than just a thought.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs - A Framework for Individual and Organizational Success

"If you deliberately plan on being less than you are capable of being, than I warn you that you’ll be unhappy for the rest of your life.”

Abraham Maslow (1908-1970)

Abraham Maslow is considered to the Father of Humanistic Psychology and the Father of Modern Management.

Above is one rendering of Dr. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. This pyramid has relevance to our personal and business lives. In order to be successful in all aspects of life, individuals (and actually organization) need to climb this ladder in steps.

Physical needs such as water, food, sleep and exercise are basics for individual success. Think of the organization as also need very specific physical needs. People, cash, physical space. (specifics) Seems simple to identify but often the most overlooked and valued.

Security needs such as need for order and rules to guide actions now become the next step as we ascend the pyramid. There are core values and systems that are needed for us individually. Every company those same requirement. The degree that those core values and processes & systems are defined and respected demonstrate how effective and productive individuals and organizations will function and thrive.

Social needs are love, affection, belongingness and freedom from fear are the middle of the hierarchy of needs. At this the midpoint of the hierarchy, the types of emotions and interactions are based on certain key motivators. Individual and organizations respond to degrees of being cared for, nurtured and included.

Esteem needs are self respect and esteem of others . This will reflect the health of our personal relationships as well as the health of our organizational relationships; how well employees, partners and community members relate and work together. Another way to describe this level is to using Daniel Goleman's four skills of emotional intelligence:
self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management to help address individual and organizational esteem.

Self Actualization Needs are the fulfillment of individual (and organizational) abilities. This is the pinnacle of the pyramid. At this level there is the demonstration that the physical, security, social and esteem needs are met at the individual or organization are fully actualized.

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs provides a great framework for both individual and organizational success.

Quarters, Nickels and Dimes

The little things add up. I needed a few pennies for the exact change and started digging in the bottom of my purse (the catchall for coins ). A elderly woman reached over a handed me one penny to complete the right amount.

Grinning sheepishly, I said I save my change and just cleaned out my purse.

She smiled broadly and said, "I do the same thing. For years I have saved quarters, nickels and dimes. When my husband first left me, I had no skills and a young son. I had to work 3 jobs. My son and I developed a routine. Quarters were saved for Christmas - we always managed to have such a lovely holiday. Nickels were saved for taxes - my one employer never took enough out. I saved dimes for 2 years and raised $2000 for a living room suite,; this covered the furniture and lamps, but no tables.

My young son asked if he could make the coffee table and end tables in shop. He would even cut glass to cover the tops.

I asked him how much he thought it would cost.

$60, he replied.

I handed him the cash (all I had left over the week at the time).

Over the years, I struggled, but the quarters, nickels and dimes helped me through many other tough times. I recently sold a successful business, but still continue to save my change. I still have those tables. Soon I will be giving my son those tables.

What an amazing story. Instead of whining, complaining and seeking a handout. This mother and son found a way to use discipline, planning and resourcefulness to survive and thrive. It all started with quarters, nickels and dimes.

Labels Can Be Limiting

"If you label me, you negate me."
Soren Kierkegaard

A nineteenth century philosopher, Kierkegaard works focused on personal choices and commitment. This quote in particular has stayed with me over the years. Labeling can be a very limiting behavior. By assigning a label to ourselves and other, we in reality can be limiting ourselves and others.

Being aware of behaviors, now that seems to be more appropriate. Consider a person who achieved success in acting and then become successful in dealing with paralysis after a devastating accident - Christopher Reeves. His label didn't make him successful. His choices and behaviors did that.

I believe it is healthier for us to consider actions and behaviors. Valuing what we can see and relate to is certainly much more significant than ascribing a label that quite honestly is just that - a label and can really be very limiting.

The person who chooses to live with little or no possessions and can live on the streets may in reality have made a conscious choice to live humbly.

10-10-10 at 10:10AM

On 10-10-10 at 10:10AM a minister shared this story with his congregation He and his wife were having dinner in a local restaurant. They were just getting ready to place their order and the minister's wife started to cry. Surprised, he asked his wife what was the matter. She told him that there was a couple at the table next to them who just had potatoes on their plates. Their waitress came to take the order and the minister asked, "Why is that couple only eating potatoes?"

The waitress replied, "That's all they could afford."

The minister and his wife were overwhelmed with empathy and quickly said, "Please tell the couple to enjoy the buffet. We'll take care of the bill."

Before the other couple left, they approached and with tears in their eyes the minister and his wife and thank them for their generosity.

Before the minister related this story, he had passed out sealed white envelops and asked the congregation not to open until he asked them to. At 10:10AM on October (10), 10th, 2010, he asked everyone to open their envelops. Inside was $50.00. His request, over the next few weeks, pay attention to someone who appeared to be in real need and give them the $50.00.

What came to mind when I heard this story was the phrase - "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

A little history...

In a 1918 publication entitled "The Higher Powers of Mind and Spirit" by Ralph Waldo Trine, he related the following anecdote, "Do you know that incident in connection with the little Scottish girl? She was trudging along, carrying as best she could a boy younger, but it seemed almost as big as she herself, when one remarked to her how heavy he must be for her to carry, when instantly came the reply: 'He's na heavy. He's mi brither."

In September 1924, Roe Fulkerson, the first editor of Kiwanis Magazine published a column carrying the title "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

Christmas 1941, Father Edward J. Flanagan came across a line drawing of a young boy carrying his brother - the caption read . "He ain't heavy Mister — he's m' brother!" The drawing had been created by Mr. Van B. Hooper who later became the editor of Ideals magazine. This phrase later became the motto for Boys Town.

In 1969 at the height of the Vietnam war, the Hollies released a ballad entitled "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

Even though times are tough, the minister and his wife are willing to help others. Whether we are at home, at work or in the community, this minister taught a valuable lesson "People aren't heavy, their our family."

So now it's up to us.

Talent - Nature and Nurture

Nurture, defined in the traditional sense, can mean family influence. However, that definition has been expanded over time in the societal sense to environmental influences, those influences outside the individual. Nature, is defined as the traits we are born with or nature has directly affected.

Appreciating that we don't come into this world as a blank slate - there are some factors that we are born certainly that can and will affect our careers, our performance and our lives. Nurture now also comes into play. What factors can and does influence our talents. How we use them, display them, and develop them.

There have been numerous instances where a person was born or acquired a physiological element that if there had not been a nurturing factor, the person would have failed. One great example comes to mind, Helen Keller. At a very young age, she was affected by a disease that left her blind and deaf. In spite of these limiting factors, she was nurtured (influenced by a mentor) Anne Sullivan to become an international author, speaker and leader.

So why focus on nature and nurture. Yes, we come with to life, experiences and work with certain traits and talents. Interestingly enough, we can actually destroy natural talent as well as develop it. There are just as many individuals, perhaps more, that because of nurture have either not developed their talent at all or have even used their talents to destroy and to damage.

When we identify what are our natural talents, we can create a baseline but that is best not to be the only factor. To nurture talent is like starting a fire with very little fuel. A spark is created and something is added or not. A word of encouragement can change a life. Just as a word of criticism can shut that life down.

Every day we have an opportunity to overcome and/or enhance our nature and develop our talent. With the right nurture, we are creating a formula for growth and success. Appreciating nature and nuturing talents is one of the greatest endeavors one can embark on, that's why I passionately pursue talent development .

Balancing Serving Others and Self

The family, the company, the community certainly can take precedence in our lives. Others need our time, our energy, our money and/or our resources and we can gladly give to them. And, how can we serve others and ourselves at the same time to ensure the best personal and professional health is quite often a balancing act.

One of the best times to help me to serve others and still serve me is when I traveling by air. Yes, any type of travel is often a challenge and especially when traveling by air. Unless we are the pilot when we are flying someone else has the opportunity to serve us. My favorite way to start each flight is to look and listen when the flight attendant gives the safety instructions. I have discovered this is the time to connect with opportunities to really enjoy the flight.

My favorite way to start each flight is the safety instruction time. Did you ever notice how many people suddenly become interested with their newspapers, books or any other distraction, just so they don't have to look at the flight attendant and listen to the instructions? The attendant, on the other hand, is trying to get our attention. They have been assigned the extremely important job of providing us with instructions to ensure our safety. Our responsibility is to give our attention with a nod, a smile and a glance at the safety instructions and good old fashion respect. Now rapport is built and a relationship established. Even the toughest flight attendant eventually tells me at least their name and always gives me a smile. It's a wonderful experience.

The second opportunity at this time, is the reminder regarding how to use the Oxygen (O2) mask. The instruction is to apply the O2 mask to yourself first and then help the person or child next to you. All too often we give to others first our time, money, energy. Then, disaster strikes and we both are destroyed. The other person because their resources are gone - we are tapped out. And we have not taken care of ourselves first and so there is nothing in left in reserve. This simple instruction has become a wonderful reminder to me. Always put the O2 mask on yourself first.

Treating the other person in any situation with respect and interest, gives them what they need. Putting the oxygen mask on ourselves first gives us the respect and interest that we need. When we serve others and ourselves it is a wonderful balancing act.

We're all Health Leaders

Are you influential in leading your community back to health? Did you know every choice you make impacts your environment? Building healthy communities begins with focusing on individuals and the community as a "whole". The physical, social, emotional and spiritual needs of the "whole" community are of equal importance.

Our role in assisting communities toward health begins with being an effective role model. It is human nature to mimic the habits of others. Commit to your own good self care for others to follow. Collaborate with co-workers to create strategies for stress management and exercise programs, and healthy food options in your organization. Be a facilitator of change by building positive relationships, and developing good communication skills.

We are all health leaders when we motivate others to seek their own good health. Promoting community health begins by setting an example of self responsibility and taking responsibility to help others.

Judy Rienzi

Health - Interventions to Flourish

The source of the word health comes from old English word haelth or hal. One of my favorite definitions is "a flourishing condition." When families, communities, and organizations flourishing, they are considered healthy.

Interestingly enough, over the course of time, the definition of health has come to mean managing disease. Subsequently, to have financial health, professional health, physical health, mental health, social health, ethical health, social health, or ... health, the focus has over time shifted to disease management. Health, as it was originally intended, back in the 12th century in England was much, much more positive.

What if we changed our focus? What if we approached health in all aspects of our life to help us grow and prosper? These questions I have been pondering a very long time.

It still amazes me (I'm an RN) to know that we spend more time and money using some type of prescription, generally medication as the primary intervention for returning people to health. This same approach is used to return business back to health, only the prescription is a popular or trendy "formula" that has been prescribed and applied. I am not saying that medications and formulas don't work. They certainly do. That being said, they are not the only interventions to help people and business to be healthier. In fact, sometimes they actually can harm if they are not evaluated and modified appropriately.

What if we considered interventions for individual and organization that were more cost effective and has a lot less side effects? Shifting the focus to interventions that help people develop positive attitudes, habits and behaviors is showing startling results. For example, the more we hone our communication effectiveness, the more we can reduce misunderstanding, mis- diagnoses and mistreatment. Improving our strategic thinking will help us achieve a weight, a style, a product or service that can sustain and even help individuals, communities and businesses to flourish. These are just the tip of the "emotional intelligence" iceberg.

The interventions that start with internal focus will help enhance and/or minimize the external interventions. Remember, health is all about developing "flourishing conditions." What interventions will help you to flourish?