"Quiet Desperation" or Contribution, Courage and Committment

If we listen to the news, conversations, or even that little voice in our heads, we may think and even believe that there is not much to hope for. As a result, we often times move into living our lives, as Thoreau would say, in "quiet desperation."

"Quiet desperation" is showing up in work or life in a constant state of panic or apathy. A "what's the use" attitude permeates all the we think and feel and as a result, we barely function. Conversations become superficial. Work and life have no value or purpose. Productivity and effectiveness suffer.

With three small shifts, we can regain control of our lives, our work and our joy and move past this "quiet desperation."

1. Contribution. Appreciate our skills and abilities is absolutely essential. Reviewing our experiences, talents and attributes will help us to evaluate what tools and assets we have in our tools kits. These capabilities are uniquely special for each of us and we have an obligation and an opportunity to share them each and every day. Anthony Robbins has a wonderful quote that says it all “It is not what we get, but who we become, what we contribute, that gives meaning to our lives.”

2. Courage. Owning our abilities and strengths now becomes a responsibility. Stepping out and stepping up can take a tremendous amount of effort and energy and yet if we do not, we have lost total control. As Susan Jeffers says it so eloquently in her book by the same title, Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway.

3. Commitment. Being committed to sharing are personal best is the turning point. There is a line from Og Mandino's wonderful book called the Twelfth Angel, "Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better." If and when we agree to face each, moment, each day, each event with this thought, I believe we can live our lives to the fullest.

"Quiet desperation" or contribute, courage and commitment, it's a choice.

10-10-10 at 10:10AM

On 10-10-10 at 10:10AM a minister shared this story with his congregation He and his wife were having dinner in a local restaurant. They were just getting ready to place their order and the minister's wife started to cry. Surprised, he asked his wife what was the matter. She told him that there was a couple at the table next to them who just had potatoes on their plates. Their waitress came to take the order and the minister asked, "Why is that couple only eating potatoes?"

The waitress replied, "That's all they could afford."

The minister and his wife were overwhelmed with empathy and quickly said, "Please tell the couple to enjoy the buffet. We'll take care of the bill."

Before the other couple left, they approached and with tears in their eyes the minister and his wife and thank them for their generosity.

Before the minister related this story, he had passed out sealed white envelops and asked the congregation not to open until he asked them to. At 10:10AM on October (10), 10th, 2010, he asked everyone to open their envelops. Inside was $50.00. His request, over the next few weeks, pay attention to someone who appeared to be in real need and give them the $50.00.

What came to mind when I heard this story was the phrase - "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

A little history...

In a 1918 publication entitled "The Higher Powers of Mind and Spirit" by Ralph Waldo Trine, he related the following anecdote, "Do you know that incident in connection with the little Scottish girl? She was trudging along, carrying as best she could a boy younger, but it seemed almost as big as she herself, when one remarked to her how heavy he must be for her to carry, when instantly came the reply: 'He's na heavy. He's mi brither."

In September 1924, Roe Fulkerson, the first editor of Kiwanis Magazine published a column carrying the title "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

Christmas 1941, Father Edward J. Flanagan came across a line drawing of a young boy carrying his brother - the caption read . "He ain't heavy Mister — he's m' brother!" The drawing had been created by Mr. Van B. Hooper who later became the editor of Ideals magazine. This phrase later became the motto for Boys Town.

In 1969 at the height of the Vietnam war, the Hollies released a ballad entitled "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother."

Even though times are tough, the minister and his wife are willing to help others. Whether we are at home, at work or in the community, this minister taught a valuable lesson "People aren't heavy, their our family."

So now it's up to us.